Jesse Metcalfe + Me!!!

jesse metcalfe is sooooo cute !

What a weird morning.... First I had this job interview downtown and I was changing my shoes on the stoop outside the building ( b/c the only way I can handle wearing dressy shoes is to change into them when I have the interview) Anyways I was taking off my socks and this guy was walking towards me and I was like who is that? Because he looked so odd. He was wearing like white leather loafers with no socks and this long tunic type of top... I noticed him at first because I was like "I thought only Persian guys dressed like that" and then I was like he looks like a skinny David beckham.... Anyways I arrived for me interview like 20 minutes early so I was walking around the area and I guess he was too. and we kept seeing each other and smiling and I was like what's with this guy (because he's like 5'4 and so I didn't think he was hitting on me) and Then I was like "ohmygaw" is that? Could it be? Is that Chad Michael Murray? Because I heard he was in town b/c his wife is doing a movie with jesse metcalfe and he doesn't like jesse metcalfe or something... Anyways it wasn't him but I was super-excited anyways..

Then the real shit happened...

I was walking by the Sutton Place Hotel on my way back from my interview ( it went good, thanks for asking) and I saw him. Waiting for a cab I guess. Standing outside in a white hoodie and a navy blazer and jeans.. I was like "Whaaat?" And most of you know my eyes are kinda bad so I totally stopped in the middle of the street and was like staring at him and he was looking at me.. Then this guy that I guess was walking behind me and probably not a big fan of Desparate Housewives, totally bumped me, I guess because I was standing there gaping at jesse metcalfe and not letting anyone by. So then While I was all like "So sorry, excuse me sir," Jesse metcalfe took off his sunglasses and then I totally knew it was him because even a blind man would recognize his bushy eyebrows..... I think his intense stare ( I think like 15 seconds he was staring at me and only me) means we're going steady... I'll keep ya posted on the weddding date....

Good Friends are the Chocolate Chip Cookies of Life.....

When you're down and you need a quick fix, good friends are there and they don't need you to rehash all the grizzly details of your latest meltdown; they don't need to turn everything around and blabber on about themselves... They are just there. Offering an encouraging word, a non-judgemental ear, an uninterrupting listening post, a long-distance phone call from the otherside of the world or even a plate of freshly baked cookies. Good friends make you relaize that your lack of a job, lack of money, lack of suitable mates, do not a good life make... For whatever reason it be, despite it all, many people are happy with nothing becuas ethey just decide to be happy. So today, I salute you my buddies, for hanging in for the many lows amid the memorable highs.. I don't know what I would do without you:)

No Job for Me....

So I didn't get that job at the vancouver Musuem... I knew it was too good to be true... It was too easy.. I was too excited.. I told too many people about it... and now I don't have it. It sucks. Today is exactly 2 weeks since I lost/quit/was fired from my job.. And I have had a total of one interview.. One interview in 2 weeks.... It's retarded. I'm not sure what's wrong with me... My roommate has like millions of job interviews and is starting a new job and it just seems like everything is fabulous for everyone but me... So i dunno what I will do... I feel the itch to do something drastic... I am not going to ge a job at like starbucks or something just so i can keep my shitty life in Van and keep going out on these meaningless 'getting to know you' dates.... It's pathetic....I never imagined my life at 26 (gulp) would be so shitty... so devoid of anything.. so unsettled.. I may not wanna be saddled with a ball and chain but is it too much to ask for a job that is in my field that pays like over $11/hr? I get the feeling it is.. this sucks....

I <3 The Arcade Fire.....

The arcade fire is so weird and cool!

Okay, So I guess I'm a little late on the arcade fire gravy train. To tell the truth, i didn't want to get on.... They seem too now, too hipster, too edgy, too only let artists and band geeks listen to our music and we love our craft and don't want to be famous..... that stuff gives me anxiety.... Plus all the holier than thou types were too busy saying how cool the arcade fire and broken social scene and magenta lane and every other obscure band from eastern Canada is, that I wanted to just wash my hands of it all.. too many hands in the cookie jar for me.... But I have been reformed. after seeing them on the MMVAs I fell in love with their un-posterboy looks and weird and wonderful performance. I especially loved how they mixed up the standard shoe-gazing fare of other arty bands with a full marching band that played dead until the last refrain of the chorus.
So i've hopped on... I'm officially on the Arcade fire band wagon. SO shoot me.... but I will try my best not to start wearing long botton down shirts or clothes that cost $300 but look like they are from value village.

Listen to some of their songs:
http://www.mergerecords.com/band.php?media=true&band_id=98

Dogs, dogs, dogs.....

So I've been pet sitting my friend, david's, baby weiner dog, Hudson, for a couple days and its starting to get weird. He's super cute but his breathe is so stank... And i got a super bad kink in my neck from trying to protect my face from his uber-breathe. He's very needy though.... Like when I have a shower he whines outside the bathroom door.... and then he wants to come in my room while I change.. and right ow he's just staring at me..... not saying anything..... nd he always wants to sleep under the covers with me... it's a little creepy.. like what is he thinking when he's just staring at me for hours? why can't he like go and do some things on his own? I don't get it. Idon't relate to dogs... I feel like they're always up to something.....But I better stop writing.. I think he's on to me.....


weiner dogs are so needy... and they have a staring problem!

Boys Are Smelly

there's something to be said for trusting your gut instinct.
A first impression can be wrong; chalk it up to nerves and wrong time/place scenarios.
A first coversation can go less than smooth; it could be he's not a big phone talker and may be he has roomates staring at him as he' trying to sound cool and casual on the phone.
A first date can end up disasterous because of high expectations or too much/ not enough libations.
A few weird telephone messages and emails could easily be attributed to drunken late night phone calls or bad advice from friends.
But your gut. Your gut is rarely wrong. It may change it's mind at the drop of a hat, tellling you he's not so lame; and maybe you're too picky and some things that seem dumb or insenstive in the moment can actually look endearing in hindsight. But your gut is never wrong.
At least mine isn't. Unlike your mind, your gut never tries to rationalize why you 'just don't feel it." Unlike your heart, your gut doesn't feel bad when you sit their at gawk at all his weird mannerisms and quirks. Your gut is the perfect indictator of who's right and who's wrong for you.
So today, I make a vow to you, my gut. I will not doubt you and will not try to talk you out of whatever you are trying to tell me to do. I put my complete trust in you, gut. So go ahead, gut and bring whoever it is that you are saving for me... whoever it is that is everything that everyone else isn't.

Lords of Dogtown rocks

Heath ledger channeling val kilmer in the Doors in Lords of Dogtown.....

So I saw Lords of Dogtown last night and it was so fun... even though heath was pulling an almost complete rip off of val klimer in the Doors... The best part was when Tony Hawk was dressed up as an astronaut getting his photo taken with one of the skaters and he trys out the skateboard and totally bails... I loved it.. everyone who was once young and thought they were 'against the establishment' should see it asap...I also loved all the hot guys wearing knee socks... knee socks are cool.... everyone should wear them again....

R.I.P. The Neon a.k.a. Georgie girl 1996-2005

I wanted to put this picture of the neon on the sidebar but I haven't quite mastered that yet..... so this will have to do for now.... This isn't even THE neon... it's an imposter. I can't believe after 9 yrs together I don't even have a photo of her. I feel like a bad mom..

Dreams are weird

So i've had the same dream like 3 nights in a row now ( since I lost my job). It feels so real that I don't even relaize it's a dream until I wake up all panicky and even after i wake up I still feel like it was real for a few minutes... i dream that I'm felling really nauseous...The room's spinning and I keep burping even few seconds. So then I decide to take a bath and my stomach feels so gross and i touch my stomach and there this weird sack protruding from my stomach. I touch it and it feels all squishy and alive. So I push it around and push it up my stomach and through my throat and then I puke it up. It's a small bag covered in green mucus with rope all over it. I look all over the bag and find a tiny hole and see a trail of fine white powder leaking from the bag. It's heroin. And like the minute that I feel like I am feeling the effects of the heroin going to my brain I wake up. Really fast.. And I like have to check myself to make sure that I'm not really high on heroin. (Not that I would even know what to expect, I imagine I would feel all schitzo) I have no idea what that means... But I've woken up 9-10 times in the past 3 nights with this same weirdo dream...and I felt the need to share.

yah! blogs make it so I don't have the bore everyone with my stories in person....

Good News Bad News....

I think I'm a pretty tolerant girl... always looking out for the little guy... you know when you vote for someone just because you feel bad because no one else will vote for them... When you buy a top because it just seems so depressingly lonely sitting there by itself... Or you decide to take pity on some poor soul who everyone else seems to ignore or hate just because you want to help out... to even out the playing field a bit.... make life a little fairer..... Well it seems that all my routing for the underdog has turned me into just that. The underdog.... the also ran.... It seems like everyone else I know is moving up in the world. Best friends are getting married buying cars, former classmates are becoming big corporate honchos and high-paid librarians, friends are getting better and better paying jobs... and I am staying so static. Still unable to stay at a 'real job' for over a year, still unable to find a boyfriend that I would even consider sharing my life with.... still stuck... the underdog.... So while I am so happy that eveeryone else seems to be having such a succesful and great life, I can't help but feel a little sorry for myself... I know, I know my time will come...blah, blah blah.... but it definelty sucks waiting....

If you want to see why everyone hates star jones : www.starandal.com
Why Lindsay Lohan is Annoying : http://www.defamer.com/hollywood/gossip/lindsay-lohan/index.php#brad-pitt-famechecks-lindsay-lohan-107241

The AfterMATH

Okay. It's day One after being fired from my job. So enough with the endless crying and pity party. It's time to be constructive. Get the resume going. Get volunteering. Apply for every job out there... It all begins today. Starting with something I wanted to do since the day my car was stolen almost 3 months ago now (sniff, sniff) ... Start my BLOG. Yah me! It will be so fun, I think. And I hope you all enjoy reading it...